January 17, 2012

As promised...first belly pic (10 weeks)

I wasn't going to post this and I'm going to be honest, it's for very shallow reasons. I don't like the way I look here. I made my husband take a gazillion photos before his patience wore thin and my hormones brought on tears.

Perhaps I shouldn't have started taking pictures at just 10 weeks because rather than look pregnant, I look as if I indulged a little too much at dinner. But then again with this being my last pregnancy, I want to be sure I document it every step of the way.

So I'm putting on my big girl pants (no pun intended), swallowing my pride and will try to embrace this process for the miracle that it is - no matter how insecure I am about my pregnant body.

10 week belly pic

The text on the chalkboard is a little small so here is what is says:

10 Weeks
Feeling: nauseous, but not throwing up anymore!
Craving: nothing really, maybe slushies
Already wearing maternity pants!

Aside from the fact that I look like a bloated blueberry and can I just say holy boobs batman?!?! I do love this picture for one reason and that is the fact that I get to have my boys be a part of this experience. They are both so excited for this baby and have been very interested in every aspect of the pregnancy so far (how big is baby now? can baby hear me? hi baby, good morning!) You would have thought I promised them a shopping spree at Toys R Us when I asked them to be in this photo. So precious.

Now that I'm 10 weeks, the nausea is starting to lift just a bit. I was so sick from weeks 6-9. When I went in for my 6 week sonogram with the fertility specialist, I had a stomach bug that left me in shambles on my bathroom floor for over 8 hours straight. I. Thought. I. Would. Die. My doctor thought it would be a good idea to head to the hospital to pump me up with some fluids and anti-nausea medicine. So right after seeing our little bean's heartbeat for the first time, off we went to the ER.

The good news is that the stomach bug seemed to dissipate the week of Christmas, so I was able to halfway enjoy myself over the holiday. The bad news is that it came back with a vengeance just in time for our 16 hour drive to Florida with my parents. I spent that entire trip with my head in a Ziploc bag (they would have stopped for me, but I just wanted to get there already). I was a little queasy and pukey while in Florida, but was still able to have a good time.

The most frustrating thing for me this time around has been my lack of appetite. Basically if I start to think about eating, I have to suppress the urge to vomit. Nothing sounds good. Nothing tastes good. And for someone who truly enjoys eating, this has been a very new and annoying thing for me. Even Sour Patch Kids  - which I consumed in large quantities while pregnant with both of the boys - just don't sound that good to me. Strange!

The most frustrating thing for Ricky this time around would most likely be the fact that I've had ZERO desire or motivation to lift a finger around the house. It takes everything in me to make it through the day without dosing off. Clean the kitchen? Vacuum? Laundry? Well that's at the very bottom of my priority list and my house definitely reflects it.

I'm looking forward to feeling a bit better and to getting my energy back (hopefully in the next few weeks). Sometimes it still feels like a dream that this is really happening again. Despite the way I feel, I am beyond excited to add to our family!






11 comments :

Laurie Rahn 10:43 PM, January 17, 2012  

How adorable are you!! You are the cutest family - totally! Ok, so the you don't like the way you look...it's just mental. You look FAB!! Really:) Hang in there!! As you know, it' all worth it in the end. Maybe, it's a girl giving you all this trouble?? Just wondering:)

Loving Life with Lucy 7:26 AM, January 18, 2012  

I think you look adorable! And what a wonderful picture of you with the boys...it's so cute that they're so excited and inquisitive!

Taryn 10:26 AM, January 18, 2012  

You are too sweet :) I am trying not to be too hard on myself - it's just these first few weeks of "bloat" that make me feel, well, not the best. My first thought was girl because everything is so different this time, but I would be just as happy being a momma of 3 boys :)

Taryn 10:27 AM, January 18, 2012  

Thank you! Even though I don't feel the best, I know this picture is going to be one I treasure forever!

murphyseven 3:21 PM, January 18, 2012  

Hi Taryn - the picture captures everything - your total happiness and the boys excitement! I would like to introduce myself...My name is Karen, we were introduced to your family when my niece Kerry Lynch shared your video with us. I was so touched by all your stories and I know that Kerry and Chris are so grateful to have found you, Ricky and of course Aiden (Ethan too). As we welcome Kerry and Chris' baby Mary Cate in to our family (She is already being spoiled by her grandmas and all her aunts!) we say thank you to yours. I look forward to your future posts...

Taryn 4:15 PM, January 18, 2012  

Karen - thank you so much for stopping by! We too are so happy to have connected with Kerry and Chris. It is so rare to find friends who understand what we are going through with this journey with Apert Syndrome and if we can provide any words of advice or comfort to them then it of course makes us feel good as well! Not to mention that it is so awesome how much we have in common with them! Hopefully we can meet them in person one day either in Dallas if they meet with Dr. Fearon or in Chicago if we make it up there to visit family :)

juliainjordan 7:34 AM, January 22, 2012  

you look great! and thank you for the raw honesty and laughs. such vulnerability is such a gift, and healing to the rest of us who have similar freak outs but don't like to admit them to the world :) this will be a beautiful gift to your child!

Taryn 9:13 AM, January 22, 2012  

Thanks! I'm glad that you visited and enjoy what you read :)

StarTraci 9:58 AM, January 22, 2012  

Glad you were feeling better so we got to meet yesterday! For both of mine, I was sick for five months! I lived on sour candy -- so much for the What to Expect... healthy diet!

Let's keep in touch!
:-)
Traci

Anonymous 9:50 PM, January 22, 2012  

Hi Taryn,How are you? I'm trying to send you a message, but it looks like I'm IMing... ooops... hopefully youll see this. (Now I'm just going to post it on the comments section of your blog- it wasn't working onf acebook, and I don't know if I have your email anymore. Oh well! Everybody will probably be able to read it) Oh well!

I wanted to tell you that I just read your post about being pregnant again, and I haven't announced it on facebook or anything, but I'm pregnant too. I related to your post- so much. I'm doing alright with the fear or the worry, but I think I haven't "announced" it on facebook because of the feelings of isolation that have come with Zane having apert syndrome, you know. It's like I have this weird thing of being upset about what people think of me... that they'll be thinking, "Wow. She had a baby with a rare craniofacial syndrome, and she's still having another baby. NERVY!". Does that make sense? I've always cared too much about what people think of me, and I've hoped that having Zane would help me to finally get past that in life... does that make sense? Facebook, for some reason, really brings out weird feelings around it all... so many people post their perfect little worlds, and it seems so fake... so superficial or something- I get upset by it. I forced myself to post Zane's birthday picture at Disneyland two days ago, just so I would be forced to deal with my own issues... I don't know if that makes sense, but it feels good to email somebody about it who's walked the same walk. I've talked to some people about it, but unless they've gone down this similar journey, I feel like they just don't have a clue, you know.... . Anyway, I just wanted to connect with somebody who has walked the walk... know what I mean?

Hang in there,

Freya

Leah 10:30 PM, March 08, 2012  

I love this post, too cute of a picture too!

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