MomLife Louisville || Bear Paddle Swim School

I know we just got through Christmas, and spring break may not be the next thing on your mind, but the only thing that is going to get me through this cold weather is counting down the days until we are on the beach again.

As the boys get older and more active, I am beginning to purge some of the toys they no longer use. So for Christmas, I asked my mom to buy less "stuff" and give more "experiences". Nolan had a few trial classes at Bear Paddle Swim School here in town and after the first class I was so impressed that I suggested my mom consider gifting the boys lessons to prepare them for all our time by the pool and in the ocean in a few months. Can't beat the practicality!

Aiden, Hudson and Nolan were THRILLED when they opened their swim package at Nana's. My mom recruited my niece to make super cute certificates which she included inside along with a skill-patch towel, a Bear Paddle teddy bear and a hooded beach towel. They are so excited for their sessions to begin in January.


What makes Bear Paddle so great? 

I had never heard of Bear Paddle until just a few months ago when they reached out to me about their new location in Louisville off Hurstbourne Ln. When we went for our first visit I was impressed with the facility. It was clean, bright, welcoming and warm. We were greeted by their friendly staff and given a tour. Afterwards we headed to the family changing area to get Nolan ready for his class. There were numerous private stalls for changing, a large grouping of lockers to keep belongings and a few swim suit dryers for after class so you don't have to toss dripping trunks into your bag to bring home. And because I'm a moderate germophobe, I'll mention again that it was very clean, which is always a huge plus in my book.

Before getting in the saltwater pool, kids are supposed to walk through a "Kiddie Car Wash" - a water shower area - but Nolan refused, so I wasn't sure he would even step foot in the pool for the lesson. Luckily, he warmed up to his instructor pretty quickly and got right in.

The gentle and fun approach that Bear Paddle uses to teach basic swim skills was perfect for Nolan. They sing songs, splash, and have the kids pretend to push the instructor in the water which always got a lot of laughs. The small lanes have a platform at the other end so the kids can stand up and catch their breath when they turn around. Genius! They worked on putting their faces in the water, getting their heads wet, floating on their back, kicking and paddling, and even getting out of the pool on the side by themselves, something I never really even thought of needing to teach!


At the end of the first class Nolan was sad and couldn't wait to come back. And once the other boys heard Nolan got to go swimming, they wanted to get in on the fun. Ethan, my oldest, swims independently, but if he ever wanted to participate, Bear Paddle also offers classes beyond the fundamentals, helping them learn and master swim strokes, flip turns and other competitive skills.

Bear Paddle also offers swim camps and pool parties. Nolan turns 4 February 1st and he has already decided he wants to celebrate with friends at Bear Paddle.




I highly recommend you check them out! For more information, visit Bear Paddle's website or give them a call and ask for your free trial class today. Only 3 months left before spring break, so get those little ones ready by helping them become confident swimmers, and helping give you peace of mind!

**I was given complimentary Bear Paddle swim lessons in exchange for social media sharing. As always, my reviews are 100% honest. 

2017: Facing Many Changes

I clearly remember the anxiety that overcame me the minute the ball dropped last New Year's Eve. Once we said goodbye to 2016, it meant we were entering "the year that Aiden would have his midface surgery". It became real. We had to start saying "this year" rather than "in the future" when discussions on the subject would come up. The anticipation for this part of his journey had lingered for so long that the build up almost broke me.

In February we got a date confirmed for the mid-face advancement procedure and an official countdown began. My emotions were strapped in tight on the scariest roller coaster you could ever imagine. Most of the time I would be okay to function normally, participate socially, smile freely. But underneath the surface my nerves were shot. 

My health suffered. I felt like a failure as a mom because there were so many moments I had to lock myself in my room to cry. The stress took a toll on my body and I bounced around from doctor to doctor begging someone to figure out why I felt like a 36 year old woman trapped in an 85 year old's body. 

And yet time didn't stop, May 19th still steadily approached.

As someone with a type-A personality, always wanting to plan things and control the outcomes, the unknowns that surrounded the major procedure my 9 year old son was going to undergo left me feeling completely out of sorts. I found a wonderful therapist who was worth every penny, but even that was no match for the craziness that swirled about my head on a daily basis. I used to be someone who kept a clean house, stayed on top of the laundry, meal-planned and cooked healthy dinners several nights a week. Someone who loved to write. Someone who felt pretty confident in her abilities to be a decent mom and manage the chaos that is mothering 4 boys under 10. 

In April, we went on spring break with a group of friends. For the second year in a row we had 14+ kids and 12 adults sharing a large beach house. It was totally crazy and definitely fun, but every second felt like I was watching it happen through the lens of "what-ifs". Every photo I took of the boys playing carefree in the sand was snapped with a lump in my throat and the gruesome thought "what if this is the last time we are on the beach together as a family of 6". 

My friend Cara happens to be an amazing photographer so when I asked if she would take our family photos that year in Destin, she happily obliged. I remember applying makeup to my sunburned face and having to put my mascara on last because of the tears I cried thinking that these would be the last professional pictures we would have as a family before Aiden's surgery. The last photos we would have of Aiden the way he was then. My mind raced, "What if these were the last family pictures with Aiden we had...ever?" 

 
Photo Credit: Caroline Couture Photography


May began and we tied up loose ends. Everyone rallied around our son with Super Aiden t-shirts, care packages and lots and lots of visits with friends and family. And then, on a sunny morning in mid-May, we said our good-byes, kissed the other boys and piled in the car careening towards the biggest unknown of all. "What if Aiden doesn't come home?"
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Handing him over was still just as difficult as it always is. Ricky and I sat silently in the family waiting room but our hearts spoke through the worry on our faces. "Please let him come back to us."

In just 4 short hours the surgery was complete and although we still had several weeks of enduring the RED device, my biggest fear subsided. I started to breathe again. He was okay. We were going to be okay. The first few weeks were the hardest. He was sad, not himself. Who could blame him. When he began doing cannonballs into the pool we knew we would make it through this too. The days were slow but the weeks flew by and before we knew it we were heading back to Dallas for the removal of the device. The final weight to be lifted off our shoulders.
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Adjusting to Aiden's new look was slow at first. We had so many mixed emotions as we stared at a boy who looked one way 8 weeks earlier and totally different now. He bounced back quickly and had a new sense of confidence which made it easier for us to accept the change.

It wasn't long after things settled down that I finally took time to care for myself. I was eventually diagnosed with Hashimotos thyroiditis, an autoimmune disease that affects the function of your thyroid. I had been on medication for hypothyrodism for years but the underlying issue was (and may have always been) Hashimotos. With a clearer diagnosis, a new endocrinologist, some new medication and significant diet changes, I started on the right path to feeling better. 

Although the surgery was behind us, I think I underestimated the time it would take for my mind and heart to heal. For many more weeks, months even, I felt like I was treading water, never able to make it to the edge for a break. I wasn't drowning anymore, but I was definitely still having trouble keeping my head above the splashes that even just a back to "normal" life surrounds you with.
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My 2017 "Best Nine" photos from Instagram (the pictures with the most "likes").
Clearly indicates what our biggest event from this year was!
Visit @MoreSkeesPlease on Instagram to follow our family.
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Looking back, this entire year has mostly been a blur. There were so many good moments - wonderful friends that lifted our family up in ways that I'll never quite be able to adequately express gratitude for. Family who literally put their lives on hold to help us sort ours out. And the overwhelming relief of a successful surgery and smooth transition from Aiden before the RED to the new Aiden after the RED. 

My strength and resolve was tested for sure, but with the love from those closest to us and even the support from complete strangers who prayed for a little boy they have never met, I'm happy to say I have found a renewed faith in God. My mind feels clear and my heart at ease. I am ready to take on 2018. Oh so grateful for the both the valleys and the peaks. Oh so grateful for this crazy beautiful life.

What Is the Mid-Face Advancement Surgery and the RED device?


102 days from surgery.

A friend asked me the other night, "So what exactly will they be doing?" As many times as I've talked about this procedure, I surprised that I found myself a little stumped on how to answer. I can tell you what the device is called, how it is attached, what the purpose of it is...but anything more in depth gets a little fuzzy. So I went to Aiden's surgeon's website and pulled information that can explain it much better than I can. Below is a summary that answers some of the most common questions I receive about this procedure.


  • The LeFort III brings the entire midface forward in one piece from the upper teeth to just above the cheekbones and the monobloc brings both the midface and the forehead forward together at the same operation.
     
  • Although the LeFort III is a major operation, of all the different procedures done for Apert syndrome it has the greatest impact on normalizing a child’s appearance and improving breathing at night.
  • In 1998 [Dr. Fearon] developed what is called a halo-distraction technique for the LeFort III. This technique utilizes a device called the RED, which is actually not red, but purple in color. It gets its name for being a Rigid External Distraction device.
  • With the RED procedure the bones of the mid face are cut loose then the skin is closed and a halo is attached to the outside of the skull with 8-10 screws. A splint (U-shaped piece of plastic) is attached to the upper teeth and two wires extend forward from this splint to attach to the halo.
     
  • The forward pull of the midface comes from the dental splint. The parents, or the child, turn two screws on the device 2 to 3-times day in order to slowly (and painlessly!) bring the midface forward.
  • The children are allowed to eat soft foods, may go to school, and can even go swimming while wearing the RED. For some children wearing this device after surgery is easier than for others.
  • Seven to eight weeks later, the device is removed with a 20-30 minute anesthetic.
  • The greatest advantage of the RED device is that it enables surgeons to move the midface much further forward than is possible the traditional technique (based on a study done at our center).
  • We have treated over 125 children with this technique, and continue to make fine improvements in this procedure.

Below are some photos shared with permission from friends in the craniofacial community who's children have undergone the RED surgery already. 





If you have any questions, please know that I am always happy to answer them! I may have to look it up myself, as I'm no expert on this by any means, but I will never be offended by the opportunity to learn and share. Just be warned that I do get emotional talking about it in person...so perhaps email would be better ;)

Feeling Blue About the RED

105 days.

That's how long sits between now and the day that our little boys face will be changed forever. As most of you know, Aiden has something called Apert syndrome. Along with the more than 12 procedures Aiden has already had, kids with Apert syndrome more often than not require what is called a mid-face advancement because the portion of their face from their brow bone to their upper jaw does not grow at the proper rate. The goal of the mid-face advancement surgery is to pull that section forward gradually. It is medically necessary in order to expand the airway in order to prevent apnea (and thus developmental delays), to address anatomical issues with the palate (which affects speech and sometimes eating), and finally, to "improve" physical appearance.

Improve physical appearance? That one kind of hurts my heart because, you see, I don't think Aiden needs his appearance improved one bit. I think my little soon to be 9 year old boy, who has had his skull broken open and pieced back together more than once, is perfect just the way he is.


I remember sitting in Dr. Fearon's office 8 years ago listening to him tell us what the typical treatment plan is for individuals with Apert syndrome. Along with sharing about the procedures to separate their fused fingers and toes, I clearly recall him casually mentioning this mid-face advancement, done around age 8 or 9, and thinking 'thank goodness we don't have to worry about that for a long time'.

And yet here we are, 105 days away, no longer a long time.

Our last trip to Dallas was fall of 2015. It was our craniofacial clinic where we bring Aiden for a round-up of appointments to check his growth, how much space his brain has in his skull, and monitor his sleeping to see if his apnea has progressed. We spend a full day bouncing from one specialist to another before finally heading to Dr. Fearon's office for his interpretation of all the tests. Because we were approaching Aiden's 8th birthday at the time, we fully expected to start the planning process for the mid-face advancement to be in May of 2016. But, we were surprised when he said that Aiden was doing well enough to postpone for another year. Nothing can describe the wide range of emotion we felt hearing those words: relief that he was doing so well, excitement that we would get to spend another summer surgery-free, and yet, also disappointment knowing we would have to endure the anxiety of anticipating this major surgery for yet another year.

We have been blessed to spend the past few years without having to put Aiden through any major procedures. In fact, he has been doing so well that I ultimately began to question whether Aiden would need the mid-face advancement at all. I had always been told that it wasn't a matter of if, but a matter of when. We would know when he needed it if he was not sleeping well due to snoring, if he was not breathing well, especially when sick with a cold, and if he was being severely made fun of because of his appearance. Now I know more goes in to it than that, but after thinking each of those things through, it became confusing to me. Aiden slept fine and rarely snored, he was able to stave off a cold in a normal amount of time (and in fact rarely got sick anymore at all), and although he does still get his fair share of stares and comments, I wouldn't call it severe teasing by any means. I was actually convinced that Dr. Fearon would say Aiden didn't need the RED afterall. In a moment of panic, I emailed him requesting a firm explanation on exactly why this is medically necessary FOR AIDEN specifically.

I'm sure I wasn't the first concerned parent to request more reassurance - and it felt good to seek a better understanding as Aiden's advocate. Dr. Fearon replied the next day with a thorough explanation. Our hopes for Aiden to escape the need were dashed.

We have been preparing ourselves in many ways over the past few months. Aiden regularly goes to a child psychologist whom he really trusts and feels comfortable opening up to about how he's feeling. I too have sought out a therapist to help me deal with my emotions as well. We talk about it only when Aiden brings it up or we need to, which is unfortunately becoming more and more often. We lean on our close-knit support group of other craniofacial families who's children have already had this procedure before us. One of our dear friends, John, actually boxed up his removed RED device and shipped it to us across the country just so Aiden could check it out closely first-hand. He along with numerous other kiddos have offered to answer questions on what to expect or any other topic Aiden might want to ask about. And I can't tell you how many times I've sat in a parking lot conducting my own kind of therapy session chatting on the phone with another cranio mom who knows exactly how it feels to be where I am right now. My goodness how all of these things have been and will continue to be life-lines to us. So very grateful.

Surgery is confirmed for May 19th, 2017. That gives us 105 days to soak up our little boy just the way he is. To prepare our hearts for the changes that are to come. This is a hard road, but we know we will get through it because we are not alone.