It Ain't EasyI often struggle with the notion that people, on the outside looking in, think that our family has it all under control. On the surface, we appear to be strong. We come across as confident and worry-free. They think that we've become comfortable with our journey.
I'm not trying to be a downer, really. And I don't want to damper the image for those who look at us as inspiration. But it's a hefty responsibility - both to be a parent of a child with an extremely rare genetic disorder, and to be a source of inspiration to others. Sometimes the two worlds collide.
We're trying to sell our house. Our beautiful, spacious, peaceful house on a great lot in a highly sought-after area. I thought it would be easy to do. But after two weeks on the market, and an offer on a house that will only go through if we sell ours, I'm losing hope. I am not totally convinced that the house we found is the perfect place for us. There are a lot of things that I don't like about it. In fact, there are many more things that I like about the house we are in now in comparison. But the thing that matters the most to me is being in a neighborhood.
I have yet to find a person who meets Aiden and isn't totally captivated by his personality and his smile. I've even had several encounters with kids who have blown me away with their very grown-up, poignant remarks about him. We've been very blessed thus far.
But these many blessings still do not cover-up the fears that lie beneath. I am very afraid of how Aiden will be perceived as he grows up. Will it be difficult for him to make friends? Will he be teased a lot? How will adults act towards him? How will they act towards us? I know it seems silly to worry about such superficial things, but that is our reality. That is the reality of today.
So with our St. Joseph statue firmly planted in the ground, I will go to bed hoping that maybe someone will see a future in our current house so we can start a future someplace else. I truly feel that it will benefit our family, and Aiden, by being in a subdivision. Where Ethan and Aiden will be able to meet other families and kids at an early age, and establish friendships that will hopefully last a lifetime.