Perfect timing

I hadn't felt homesick yet living all these miles away from the rest of my family until just a week or so ago. It isn't the approaching holidays. It isn't for lack of seeing them (because I really only saw them once a month or so). And it certainly isn't because I talk to them less (thank goodness for reasonably priced unlimited long-distance phone packages).

What set it off was a shopping trip. When Ricky came home from work last week I must have had that glazed over "I want to change my name to anything but mommy" look on my face. My amazing man handed me the car keys and said "Go. Get out of the house for a bit. Go shopping."

Uhhhhhh....gee....okay! (Isn't he great) :)

So I headed to my favorite place. TJ Maxx.

As I was aimlessly browsing, I made my way to the kids section where I bumped in to a mom and daughter who were giddily sorting through the clearance section looking for the perfect outfits for the girl's kids.

"Oooohhh - this one is cute. So-and-so would look adorable in this."

"Well what about this one? Do you like this?"

"I just bought that the other day to put away for her birthday"

I was totally caught off guard by the feeling that overcame me at that moment. I so wished I were shopping with my mom, picking out things for the boys and getting her opinion on which pair of shoes or what color shirt to get. I wanted to be discussing with my sister about what was in our baskets, how much it all cost, rationalizing why these were SUCH good deals and we just HAD to buy it and how to spin it for our husbands to soften the blow...then putting half the things back on our way up to the register as guilt overcame us. I teared up for a split second. Then realized how silly I'd look if I became a sobbing mess in the middle of the store so I bit my lip and abandoned my basket full of impulse buys mid-aisle and left.

I called my mom when I got in my car. She was out shopping with my sister.

And so I admit, I miss home. I miss being able to hop in the car to "meet halfway" between Louisville and NKY for lunch with the kids on a moment's notice. I miss being included in plans simply because they are deemed not significant enough to invite someone who lives thousands of miles away. I miss knowing that if I need my family, rather than a gas-tank and a day-trip, it would take a huge chunk out of their wallet and some major schedule rearranging to make a visit happen.

At the same time I am so completely happy here. I'm so proud of the chance that my family took to create something all our own and do something that put us out of our comfort zone. I'm so impressed with how well Ricky has taken to his new role at work. Overall, this transition has been more smooth than we could've imagined.

But I had to know that it was only a matter of time before the homesickness set in. So yes, mom, dad, I do miss being closer to home. But it makes your impending arrival for a week-long visit that much more exciting. And the thought of making the trek home for the holidays feels a little "Hallmark television special". And most importantly, I've made some wonderful friends in the few short weeks that we've been here which has me hopeful for what is to come for us here in Texas. And I really feel that there are many good things to come.

Having my mom and dad visit for Thanksgiving, then my sister coming the week after...then coming back from our holiday visit to await my cousin Angie and her husband and then my bestie Audrey's arrival in January...these visits are perfect timing. I'm one who is affected by the lack of sunshine in the winter months. So having my family and friends coming to town will, in a way, bring a little sunshine when I need it the most.

1 comment :

  1. so I'm crying reading this...
    i'm so proud of you and and Ricky for taking this risk that seems to be working out perfectly. 7 years later, I still have a hard time accepting the fact that I'm still 2 hours from my family and that's probably never going to change. I'm still working on calling Owensboro HOME because home is where your Mama is, right?