tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6209411204914238553.post8936037723430803516..comments2023-06-19T10:24:06.335-05:00Comments on More Skees Please: When Mama Bear Comes OutTarynhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17301740249699821366noreply@blogger.comBlogger27125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6209411204914238553.post-7855323981329086372013-08-28T14:15:05.296-05:002013-08-28T14:15:05.296-05:00Taryn: This is why there's the saying: It Take...Taryn: This is why there's the saying: It Takes A Village. There is absolutely nothing wrong with another parent pointing out your child's mistakes, especially if it helps them learn in that moment. I wish more moms and dads would do that so you (and I) wouldn't feel "out of line" or like the "mean lady." Being a parent empowers you to help all children, not just your own, right? I was at a Bar Mitzvah this weekend and the two kids in front of me, whose parents flanked them, were talking and horsing around during the service. My husband leaned forward and asked them--no, told them--to be quiet and stop playing around. Their parents never even seemed to notice them or had simply tuned them out--and they were right there! I was at the movies with the hubby on a Saturday night (so not seeing anything animated!) and there was an older teen girl texting during the film. You better believe I leaned over and told her to put her phone away. So in these situations (or on the playground or in the market), you are more than justified to speak up, and I think you can tell from all the comments, your actions are actually appreciated. Thank you for being such an awesome person. Sharon Levy, Los Angeles, CAnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6209411204914238553.post-35312415379766726192013-04-12T18:17:04.845-05:002013-04-12T18:17:04.845-05:00There are lots of parents that have no business gu...There are lots of parents that have no business guiding our youth. They have poor manners, don't deal well in social situations themselves and probably don't care what their kids do. At least you are one of the good ones.Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05597500850623653392noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6209411204914238553.post-9291513334525902392013-04-12T17:35:17.312-05:002013-04-12T17:35:17.312-05:00That makes me so sad. So sad that the child would ...That makes me so sad. So sad that the child would say something like that and move away from him. Heartbreaking. You know, you hope, as a mother you can instill the values in your child that you have, but you just never know how kids will act when you are not around. I am sure that child's parents would be horrified at his behavior. Also disturbing about the child that purposefully kicked Aiden at the park. What on earth. Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07874897254332872367noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6209411204914238553.post-30319642134351887312013-04-12T13:47:49.191-05:002013-04-12T13:47:49.191-05:00Thanks for everyone's thoughtful comments. It ...Thanks for everyone's thoughtful comments. It is great to have so much feedback and to know that the conversation is being continued at home with your children. In response to the last "anonymous" comment, I appreciate your honesty. And you bring up a very good point. No, I would not judge you or your child from that one interaction -- as I said in my post, I understand (and am used to, quite frankly) the questions and comments from kids. But after experiencing 3 insensitive comments in a row with no parent around for any of them, I admit my frustration grew. Sure, I understand that we cannot always pay such close attention to our kids, especially if they are older and have a bit more freedom. What I do know is that the older the kid, the more I hope they would be receptive to talking to me about what they've said, apologize (without having to be told) and to be sincere in doing so. Like you, I hope that my kiddos know not to act that way or say something hurtful about another person whether I am around or not -- and like you, I certainly hope they could have the maturity to right the wrong if they catch themselves doing so. <br /><br />It sounds like you are doing all the right things - just knowing you discussed this exact topic with your child after reading it lets me know you are a good mama! Keep spreading the word and keep the discussion going :)Tarynhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17301740249699821366noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6209411204914238553.post-40989710970301390392013-04-12T13:47:29.501-05:002013-04-12T13:47:29.501-05:00Thank you for this excellent post. I shared the li...Thank you for this excellent post. I shared the link on my GG FB page.Green Grandmahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12988134199408897833noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6209411204914238553.post-50600705304444637132013-04-12T08:50:40.775-05:002013-04-12T08:50:40.775-05:00I love this. I try to teach my daughter that all p...I love this. I try to teach my daughter that all people are different and beautiful. My children are mixed and I can't tell you how many strangers stop me and say "Is her daddy black or mexican?" What?! How about just say she's beautiful? lol Christa Grahamhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01314410884689974665noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6209411204914238553.post-49513675783800552142013-04-12T08:05:28.565-05:002013-04-12T08:05:28.565-05:00Amen! I love this <3Amen! I love this <3Emily @ TheBusyMomsDiethttp://www.thebusymomsdiet.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6209411204914238553.post-44587936012539411042013-04-11T20:23:32.470-05:002013-04-11T20:23:32.470-05:00I'm so sorry you've had to deal with this....I'm so sorry you've had to deal with this. I have a son who others see as different. It takes a little bit as it's his behaviors, but it seems that kids have some sort of radar that shouts "this kids is different" and they call him names (weird, freak, monster). And I've been that mama bear, fighting for him. B/c the parents are nowhere in sight. I had a really bad situation happen last week where a group of girls kept going after him, calling him monster, yelling to "get him" and shoving him. He finally got fed up and hit one of them. And THAT is when the moms decided to pay attention. Not to the HOUR before that, when their girls were being total brats who needed to be told to leave a child alone. It got really ugly. Shellhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06811697675090627618noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6209411204914238553.post-79528910910197052602013-04-10T21:06:14.663-05:002013-04-10T21:06:14.663-05:00This is beautifully written. I felt like I was rig...This is beautifully written. I felt like I was right there with you yelling at that little boy. It's heartbreaking and from one mama bear to another you did not overreact! :) Parents need to step up and educate their children. <br />So happy to have found your blog!Jennifer Lizzahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13932076809345899876noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6209411204914238553.post-57631591640759053502013-04-10T17:02:14.546-05:002013-04-10T17:02:14.546-05:00I've been thinking hard on this post since I r...I've been thinking hard on this post since I read it the other day. I showed my seven year old your family photo and asked what he saw. "All boys in their family!" That was the first thing. The second was that your family has a baby. Last he said the not smallest one looks different from the brothers. I asked what he would do if this child was at the park and came to swing by him. Say hello of course. That's what he said. I hope that's what would happen. But what if I walked away to help the four year old on the bucket swing for a minute and he was in a rotten mood. What if he was not very friendly? What if he stared? Or asked why he looked that way with curiosity? Am I terrible mom for not being there right then to stop it and correct his behavior? Am I a terrible mom that I missed that chance to educate him so he never behaved that way in the future? Am I terrible mom that he did that? Is he a terrible child? After reading this, I fear that at least some would think I am and that he is. I hope that we can be more respectful all the time to each other. Like you wished, I wish we did not have to worry about it. I will worry more now because I cannot be right there all the time. Like you were with your baby, sometimes I am putting attention to another child and I might miss a moment, like when the boy kicked. My kids have never kicked or bitten or hit anyone and I hope they never do but they have had it happen to them. I like your list alot. We do those things. I do have a child with special needs but they are hidden on the inside. That's really hard too. people look and expect the normal and then it's not there. You do have to remind people to be kind, big ones and small ones. That's right, and it is also tiring sometimes. I hope people see your list and take it to heart. I hope kids of any kind can just go have fun at a playground.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6209411204914238553.post-69680724132893806742013-04-10T09:16:48.268-05:002013-04-10T09:16:48.268-05:00The woman next to me on the bench at the play scap...The woman next to me on the bench at the play scape was a school principal and said she would have reacted the same way. It makes me think about school professionals and how I hope they will carry out the role of protecting kids from being bullied - especially with Aiden starting kinder next year. <br /><br />Thanks for stopping by!Tarynhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17301740249699821366noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6209411204914238553.post-11926093193798442662013-04-10T09:14:29.952-05:002013-04-10T09:14:29.952-05:00Ahh - so you definitely "get it". We hav...Ahh - so you definitely "get it". We have lots of friends with all kinds of Craniofacial differences (have you connected with Children's Craniofacial Association?) Good luck to you and thanks for commenting!Tarynhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17301740249699821366noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6209411204914238553.post-41106387241597603072013-04-10T09:12:16.390-05:002013-04-10T09:12:16.390-05:00You are so sweet Traci! Of course we all *hope* th...You are so sweet Traci! Of course we all *hope* that our kids would never be the ones to react in such a way, but the truth is sometimes even the sweetest kids can react out of character. I usually find that *the good ones* are very apologetic and receptive to making amends. :)Tarynhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17301740249699821366noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6209411204914238553.post-37714806321929768712013-04-10T09:06:51.684-05:002013-04-10T09:06:51.684-05:00Thank you!Thank you!Tarynhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17301740249699821366noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6209411204914238553.post-64592308145463445192013-04-10T09:06:14.323-05:002013-04-10T09:06:14.323-05:00Hi Shelley - so sorry we missed chatting at the ga...Hi Shelley - so sorry we missed chatting at the game! To be perfectly honest I do not remember seeing y'all there and so I don't know if either of the offending boys were yours. We were barely in the pool area at all. If I had made the connection, I most certainly would have let you know. :) Either way, maybe you could use this as an opportunity to discuss how they would handle a similar situation if they ever found themselves in one. Take care and hope we can connect at a future blogging event!Tarynhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17301740249699821366noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6209411204914238553.post-30878319910613485282013-04-10T09:01:34.226-05:002013-04-10T09:01:34.226-05:00Glad you were able to think of us in handling the ...Glad you were able to think of us in handling the situation. :) We miss you at KRK too and Aiden still talks about his Spencer all the time!Tarynhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17301740249699821366noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6209411204914238553.post-47100965407656831042013-04-10T08:59:44.246-05:002013-04-10T08:59:44.246-05:00Thanks Robin!Thanks Robin!Tarynhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17301740249699821366noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6209411204914238553.post-36122439833291915142013-04-10T08:58:56.911-05:002013-04-10T08:58:56.911-05:00Kelly - lets get something on the calendar! I'...Kelly - lets get something on the calendar! I'd love to get together :) Shoot me an email!Tarynhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17301740249699821366noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6209411204914238553.post-72505776938337465992013-04-10T08:30:40.796-05:002013-04-10T08:30:40.796-05:00You didn't exaggerate at all! In fact you were...You didn't exaggerate at all! In fact you were very composed and level headed, I don't know if I would have handled it so well. And you're also setting a wonderful example for your kids, teaching them to stand up for themselves and for others.The Bonny Bardhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06164325917061110813noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6209411204914238553.post-18786553700626329202013-04-10T06:23:43.914-05:002013-04-10T06:23:43.914-05:00How sad that the parents were not around in those ...How sad that the parents were not around in those cases. As some-one who worked at a daycare for several years, sometimes I forget that I'm not the teacher when I see kids misbehaving. <br /><br />Hubby sometimes laughs at me because no matter where we go I end up with kids hanging around me. In the same breath, I have also scolded or gotten on kids that were misbehaving, without even considering the parent might be around!<br /><br /><br /> Oh well, you don't take care of your kid, I probably will. Especially if another child is being hurt.<br />Visiting from Pour Your Heart Out.A Proverbs 31 Wifehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02086440073763745054noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6209411204914238553.post-61687829980191557472013-04-08T22:14:21.501-05:002013-04-08T22:14:21.501-05:00I had an embarrassing incident with Spencer just t...I had an embarrassing incident with Spencer just this morning, and my reaction to it is something I learned from you and precious Aiden. We went into a gas station where we were checked out by a very kind and polite cashier who was covered in tattoos and piercings. As we were leaving the store Spencer loudly proclaimed that she was "scary". I said, "she is not scary she is very, very nice". We talked a little more in the car about how people can look different on the outside but feel the same on the inside, and how it is not nice to say hurtful things about people. I know this is not quite the same as what Aiden has to deal with because this cashier chose her differences.... but I wanted to share with you anyway so you know that you are teaching and making an impact on people all the time!<br /><br />Leigh AnnAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6209411204914238553.post-847705951242934802013-04-08T19:07:24.975-05:002013-04-08T19:07:24.975-05:00Well written. My wife and I experience this all th...Well written. My wife and I experience this all the time as well. My son has Pfeiffer Syndrome and a trach. Fight on. You have a beautiful family. All our best. Stefan Happ & family. The National Midnight Starhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08412775533104444960noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6209411204914238553.post-87254027305441649892013-04-08T16:38:01.773-05:002013-04-08T16:38:01.773-05:00Taryn,
I am so sorry that you had to do that. I t...Taryn, <br />I am so sorry that you had to do that. I think, pray, hope that I have raised my children so they wouldn't do such a thing. But more, I hope that should they choose so poorly I am close enough to teach them and help them to make amends. For the record, Aiden is preciously cute and he is terribly sweet. He deserves nothing but the best and luckily he got that in you as a Momma.<br />HUGS<br />TraciStarTracihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02119043204191845721noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6209411204914238553.post-61317510628390653742013-04-08T16:15:09.430-05:002013-04-08T16:15:09.430-05:00I just stumbled across your blog post, and I must ...I just stumbled across your blog post, and I must say, Aiden is very lucky to have you as his advocate. Not only are you thinking about how the negative actions and words of others can impact Aiden, but you are also very constructive in your suggestions on how to address these negative instances. I am a mother for four children and a grandmother of 3. Though none of them have physical characteristics that differ them from other children or adults, but most of them are dealing with mental illnesses that set them apart from other children and adults. I have seen my children as they sit crying because other kids don't want to play with them for one reason or another, and my heart always broke because I couldn't make it any better. Kudos to you for being a wonderful role model for Mom's of children with disabilities AND Mom's that have no idea how to deal with their children in these situations. Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6209411204914238553.post-43672823176960208282013-04-08T15:36:13.533-05:002013-04-08T15:36:13.533-05:00So, after reading this, I mentally went through ye...So, after reading this, I mentally went through yesterday... knowing that we too were at the baseball game in the pool area with you and further knowing that my kids were allowed to venture off to the fun zone without me present while I engaged in adult conversation... my hope is that my kids would NEVER EVER EVER act that way... but at 10 & 13 I do allow them a bit of freedom to not be with me at all times provided they were safe. If during those unsupervised times, they acted a fool, I not only would EXPECT another adult to say something right then and there, but would hope that if they later saw the boys with me, they would bring their inappropriate behavior to my attention so that I could further handle the situation.<br /><br />I hope that my kids were not to blame, but if they were, please accept my deepest apologies.Shelleyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17610756118162569468noreply@blogger.com